How to Be a Leading Lady When Your Confidence is Lacking

November 24, 2016

 

Darling, it’s time to let your inner goddess sparkle.

 

Own your feminine power and strut your stuff down the catwalk of life.

 

It doesn’t matter where you’ve come from. Today is the day you are going to become the leading lady of your own life. And if others around you don’t like it, well, there’s the door. Hold it open for them.  

 

 

Find Your Sexy

 

I hear so many women whining about their man, or some man, treating them badly. They’ve rearranged their entire lives to suit this man. Bought fancy clothes to show off for him, shimmy into sexy lingerie to entice him, support him on his business ventures, raise his children, do his laundry, clean his house, and basically set aside the spark in their eyes to be the backbone of such a great man. 

 

Excuse me as I roll my pretty eyes.

 

Not anymore.

 

 

Can you see my finger wagging at you? Yes, you. I see you averting your eyes.

 

How do I know it’s you?

 

Because I have been you. So many of us are you.

 

Enough.

 

 It’s such a shame that after all this time we are still protesting this shit. We are still trying to find our groove. Trying to find our footing as women in a modern world that should love and appreciate us for the brains in our heads, not boobs on our chests. But the struggle is real.

 

Embrace your womanhood. Stop trying to please him and start pleasing yourself. Start using it to your advantage…again. Why did we ever stop? For Christ sake. If the world is going to slut shame us, we mine as well use it for something good.

 

I don’t mean go and sleep your way up the ladder, but maybe boost your boobies up a notch, bat your eyelashes, give a gentleman a little side smile before looking in the other direction. It’s not that hard, and they half expect it anyways.

 

Use your brains. Why are we resisting the magnificent gift of feminine energy and beauty trying to ‘fit into a man’s world’? It’s a fight I’m tired of fighting. Masculine energy has its place, but let’s start with a little purring before we let out the beast. It’ll make the blow that much sweeter when we eat them alive.

 

That’s right ladies. Get that sexy ass of yours to the nearest Secrets from Your Sister and squeeze into something fiery hot.

 

But this time, do it for yourself.

 

Do it to feel powerful. Do it to feel sexy. Do it to boost your self esteem. Because honey, you fucking deserve it.

 

 

Once you've done that, and maybe added a little black dress to your shopping bag, tell your man to do his own damn laundry this weekend, you’re going out with the ladies. 

 

Yep. Leave him home with the kids. He's a smart guy. Of course he is. He's with you. So, he can handle it.

 

 

Stop Competing with Other Women 

 

Now that we’ve infused a little sexy sass into our lives and relieved some stress on the dance floor, let’s work on competing with other women.

 

Here’s how to do it properly.

 

Don’t do it at all.

 

Other women are not the enemy. You are your own worst enemy. All the terrible things you think other women are thinking about you are… wait for it….

 

Not true!

 

And if they are, who the fuck cares. You do you. Because you are fabulous.

 

Say this with me: I am fabulous. I am smart. I can do this.

 

Now breathe deeply. 

 

Just like in yoga, focus on your own practice. Focus on your mat. Focus on yourself.

 

What others look like doesn’t matter. It’s how you feel that counts. And if you feel great, great things will happen to you. You will attract the right experiences, opportunities, and people. And if you continue to believe in yourself and hold onto your feminine power, these things will stay in your life.

 

 

Stop caring what other people think of you and start living your life. The energy you waste caring too much about other people’s opinions could be used in much more productive ways, like taking burlesque lessons.

 

I’m seriously considering this. Want to form a troupe with me? Email me if your answer is YES! 

 

Women can work together to enhance their ferocity and take over the world. Remember, we run this. Without us, the human race wouldn’t exist.

 

Stop hating on other women and start working with them to take over the world.

 

 

Own Your Emotions, Let Go, Move On 

 

Now that you’re feeling hot and connected to the feminine energy in the room, it’s time to talk about your inner baby girl. The little girl inside of you unapologetically crying for her mommy, arms outstretched, tears streaming down her face.

 

It’s time to own your shit.

 

Take control of your emotions. Accept that you’ve been hurt. And move on.

 

It’s ok to cry. It’s ok to be angry with your mom, dad, and ex lover (whatever your issues might be). But stop allowing those old hurts to control you. Stop identifying with the pain and start living your life.

 

Hey, I’ve been there. Most of the time I hate my mother and blame my dad for my issues with men, but I always pick myself up off the floor, get dressed, and get moving. I always get back on the horse and ride off into the sunset towards my destiny. 

 

You're new mantra: I'm an adult and take full responsibility for my actions, fears, and emotions. They do not control me. I control them. 

 

Say it with conviction.

 

Let go of the past.

 

Try this.

 

Close your eyes and imagine yourself in a dark space.

 

Now see all past hurt clinging to you with red leather straps. You are tangled in the straps. Choking on your own pain. An angel appears before your eyes and hands you a samurai sword. Take the sword in your dominant hand and begin slicing at the straps, tethering yourself to your past. Keep swinging until you are free.

 

Feel that freedom. Embrace it.

 

Now visualize a white light shining before you. Walk towards it, holding your sword at your side, now dripping with bad blood. Before you step into the light, wipe the bad blood off. See your mighty sword shining in the light. Then step into the light and come back home. Come back to the present moment.

 

You are now free to live and love in peace and harmony.

 

 

Move Forward and Shine Your Light on the World 

 

Be the woman you would want to be around. Be your own best friend.

 

 

If you’re having trouble finding your sexy, connecting with your feminine power, or letting go of your past, connect with me. I will help you get there.

 

 

 

 

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©2019 BY KARA-LEE BURKE

Oakville, ON, Canada